Ziggy has left the salon with a hairdo she wants to burn.Ī “professional” photographer who will stop at nothing to get the perfect shot. Poor Linda has made the painful mistake of gluing her palm to her cheek. DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS - Maltz Jupiter Theater, Inc. Lucille isn’t the cashier any of us would wish to buy goods from. Here are 20+ comedic audition monologues for women, kids, and teens.
#Dirty comedic monologues for women free
Kelly is upset that she thinks her good friend is robbing her creativity blind.Ī waitress has mastered the art of making a man wait before she agrees to saying yes for a first date.Ĭorky talks to two strangers about her life…she does this by entering their apartment and bringing them free pizza. Context: This monologue is from the 10-minute comedy Couples Costume, which features 4 non-binary teenage characters. There is simply no way out before that one. Rose wants her boyfriend to clearly explain to her why he doesn’t seem to be that great at aiming his urine into the toilet bowl. Next you run up against Valentine’s Day which has the same gift conundrum as your preferred winter holiday. Two close friends are constantly being bothered by men approaching them.Īlexa has been living with the be all end all dirtiest roommate alive. Great monologues for women and girls, searchable by gender, theme, play title, author, and more. Maggie’s son has been giving her nothing but heartache and she doesn’t know what to do about him anymore. Monologue Genie is a site devoted to offering actors a treasure trove of original, contemporary comedic and dramatic monologues to be used in competition and. Find female monologues in Backstage’s Monologue Database, The Monologuer. Meagan wants to really know why guys always play dumb games if they are interested. McPickles has unfortunately lost her life. Zara promised to do her friend a favor and watch her dog for a few night but taking care of little Oscar has turned out to be nothing short of a nightmare.īeverly thought she’d be happy getting married and having a house in the suburbs but things don’t seem to have gone as originally imagined. Start your audition funny by declaring that your guinea pig Mrs. Actress response using these LOL monologues is awesome. Why did you run toward the light you idiot!! Who dies for no reason at all? Are you crazy? Breathe you dummy! Open your freaking eyes!!! Ughhhh.15 Powerful Female Comedic Monologues contains funny and edgy pieces for the comic female performer. How could you die? That's the dumbest thing you ever did. Who is the murderer at this dinner party It turns out, our monologist did it in the kitchen with a peanut Hit and Run - a woman who has been involved in a hit and run earlier in the evening talks to her lover about the horrible moment and what she plans to do now. Wake Up! Why aren't you answering me? What kind a friend pretends to be dead and lays in a casket and holds their breath that long? Margot!!!!! You can't be dead, I should be dead. Death by Peanut - this comedic monologue for women satires the game/movie Clue. Margot come on say something!!! I see that smirk on your face. If you don't hurry and tell these people that this is a joke they are going to barry you and you know how much we hate getting dirty. Margot I know you're faking! This is not funny anymore. (She stabs her neck with the pen but nothing happens) Don't panic everyone! I'm still alive. (She takes a pen out of her pocket and aims it toward her neck) Here I come Margot. Sydney- Why am I alive? I should be dead!!! Margot should be alive! I'm coming with you Margot! You don't have to be alone. ( Sydney is at her best friend Margot's funeral who died unexplainably)